If you laugh don't blame me...... - ZR-1 Net Registry Forums

carter200 · 05-11-2011

I had just come out of the store with two porterhouse steaks, a jumbo sausage, a bag of chips, and a 6-pack of beer. A homeless man sat there and said, "I haven't eaten for two days." I told him, "I wish I had your frickin will power."

Top tip:

If you're camping in the summer and the attractive girl in the next tent tells you that because it's so hot she will be sleeping with her flaps open, it's not
necessarily an invitation to casual sex. Wish me luck.....I appear in court next Monday.

A fat girl served me food in McDonalds at lunch time. She said, 'sorry about the wait.' I said, 'don't worry, you're bound to lose it eventually.'

I was behind a rather large woman at the checkout. She had on a pair of jeans that said, 'Guess.' I said, "I don't now........maybe 350 pounds."

I have a new pick up line that works every time! It doesn't matter how gorgeous or out of my league a woman might be, this line is a winner and always end up in bed with them. Here's how it goes, "Excuse me love, could I ask your opinion? Does this damp cloth smell like chloroform to you?"

Years ago it was suggested 'that an apple a day kept the doctor away.' But since many doctors are now Muslim, I've
found that a bacon sandwich works best.

I took my Biology exam last Friday. I was asked to name two things commonly found in cells. Apparently Blacks and Mexicans were not the correct answers.

RUSSELL · 05-12-2011

Don't worry Carter I didn't laught don't want to get in trouble for waking the wife. LOL !!

05-11-2011	#1
carter200 Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Texas Posts: 2,431	If you laugh don't blame me...... I had just come out of the store with two porterhouse steaks, a jumbo sausage, a bag of chips, and a 6-pack of beer. A homeless man sat there and said, "I haven't eaten for two days." I told him, "I wish I had your frickin will power." Top tip: If you're camping in the summer and the attractive girl in the next tent tells you that because it's so hot she will be sleeping with her flaps open, it's not necessarily an invitation to casual sex. Wish me luck.....I appear in court next Monday. A fat girl served me food in McDonalds at lunch time. She said, 'sorry about the wait.' I said, 'don't worry, you're bound to lose it eventually.' I was behind a rather large woman at the checkout. She had on a pair of jeans that said, 'Guess.' I said, "I don't now........maybe 350 pounds." I have a new pick up line that works every time! It doesn't matter how gorgeous or out of my league a woman might be, this line is a winner and always end up in bed with them. Here's how it goes, "Excuse me love, could I ask your opinion? Does this damp cloth smell like chloroform to you?" Years ago it was suggested 'that an apple a day kept the doctor away.' But since many doctors are now Muslim, I've found that a bacon sandwich works best. I took my Biology exam last Friday. I was asked to name two things commonly found in cells. Apparently Blacks and Mexicans were not the correct answers. __________________ 95 ZR-1 BLK/Gry #392 LT5 Reg# 868 RIP ZR1NET Founding Mem #155

05-12-2011	#2
RUSSELL Join Date: May 2008 Location: Brownwood Texas Posts: 119	Re: If you laugh don't blame me...... Don't worry Carter I didn't laught don't want to get in trouble for waking the wife. LOL !!