The Best Ticket (Warning)

[Dynomite]

How to get just a Warning.

Officer.....You were going between 65 and 85, what is your hurry?
Me.......I was trying to catch the guy in front of me.
Officer......is he a friend of yours?
Me......No.
Officer.....after checking me out in his patrol car......I will give you just a warning this time.

Another Warning.

Officer.........It is illegal to talk on cell phone while driving in CA.
Me.......I am lost.
Officer.......Where you headed?
Me.....after telling officer where I was headed officer gives directions and Warning.

Another Warning.

Officer......Do you know speed limit on this highway?
Me........Not sure.
Officer.......You were going 85 and speed limit is 55.
Me.......Oops.
Officer.....Let me see your insurance proof.
Officer.....this is not current........
Me.....digging up another insurance proof out of glove box.
Officer......OK.....guess I read the first one wrong.
Officer........just remember the speed limits and slow down...warning.

Another warning.
Me......In my Hot Rod Days...
Officer........you were going a bit fast.
Me.......Hmmmmm.
Officer.....Could be because your rear tires are larger in diameter?
Me.....Yes....that could be the reason as I just but on new rims.
Officer.....have that speedometer calibrated for those larger tires ........warning.

You all must have some good excuses you can add
My wife is not so lucky

I always keep my hands on top of steering wheel with drivers license and insurance proof in my left hand. If I have to reach for glove box I tell the officer first